⭐️ Book Review: “The Strength of Water”
By Shen Yang
“The Strength of Water” | Photo courtesy of Karin K. Jensen
Before I read The Strength of Water, all I knew about the gold rush in California was how Chinese men suffered and struggled to make a living; After reading the story, I had a much deeper understanding of how Chinese women survived and thrived in a totally foreign environment.
If digging for gold in the mountains was the “old gold rush” in the 19th century, then the “new gold rush” in the 20th century was definitely the laundry business. Discrimination towards Asian immigrants made it difficult for them to find other jobs at the beginning: the low start-up costs and the willingness to work hard in the laundry business provided them with a place to work and live to attain relative financial security and, most importantly, to send money back to support their families in rural areas of China.
Born in 1923 in the United States, Helen Yee was the eldest daughter of the Yee family, where she not only witnessed her young parents devoting themselves to their laundry business but also persisted in having one child after another until they finally had a baby boy. People valued sons more highly than daughters, and a woman who gave birth to only female offspring was regarded as unsuccessful back then. Their tenacity rewarded them with a son but it also took a toll on the wife’s already fragile health.
“Go with what life brings.” Helen’s mum often used to say. Indeed, life had turned out so differently from what she and everyone else in the family had expected. When disaster strikes, Mr. Yee brings his children back to his home village in China, where he can maintain them cheaply while he returns to the U.S. to earn money for their support. Consequently, we get to see a fascinating glimpse of everyday life in rural China nearly 100 years ago.
But due to the poor living conditions and a combination of other things, Helen later suffered seriously from malaria. “Our survival was only partly in our hands, so we could not but feel the influence of fate.” This time, fate didn’t turn its back, after two years of intermittent struggle with malaria, she miraculously survived. When she finally recovered, her stepmother wanted her to marry a man who is 20 years older. Luckily, her father disagreed and arranged for her to return to the US. Which was the last and the least he could do for her.
Lack of proper education and no further financial support from her father left Helen no choice but to live under other people’s roofs and work for them. “We do not take charity from anybody, we take care of ourselves!” Helen never forgot her father’s words, they were so deeply etched into her mind that independence soon became her driving force.
Prejudice and racism towards Asians at that time and lack of proper education precluded her from any job but being a waitress, but her diligence and positive attitude earned her both salary and respect.
“My whole life had been being happy to survive from day to day. With little education and parents too bound up in their survival to guide me, I had learned everything through hard knocks. But every situation in my life had been temporary so whatever mistakes I made could be fixed.”
Helen entered an ill-advised marriage when she was 20 years old. Her married life offers an intimate view of how both Chinese and American culture in the mid-20th century often trapped women in unhealthy relationships because marriage was such a key part of their status. But stepping into the wrong marriage was definitely not the end of the world. Within the darkness, she created some light.
Helen never went to university, but what she had learned in life was more than enough. She developed a high EQ, sharp observation, stronger resilience, and empathy toward others. She had observed and experienced enough in her life to know that integrity meant all the world to her. She deserved to be cherished, to be loved, to be respected, and to have a real shot at life before it was too late. Fate didn’t fail her this time, and she lived her life to the fullest.
As the eldest daughter of the Yee family, Helen not only kept in her heart what her mum had told her but also proved through her actions that she was always able to keep herself together and take care of her sisters and brother. As she said, she had the strength of water, which flows through cracks and low places, carves through mountains, remains unaltered, and connects everyone. It took ten years for her to reconnect and reunite the whole family, but it was a blessing to be together and write their own legend~
“Ever since Kimmie was little, I have told her my stories. I wanted her to know where I came from, what life can be like for those born into less fortunate circumstances, and how life isn’t always fair. I especially wanted her to know how hard some people have to fight for their slice of happiness. I am grateful and proud that I was able to enjoy some of the blessings of this world before I passed on and that I was able to help my family do the same.”
She valued family, integrity, courage, and hard work, she has taught everything she knew to her beloved Kimmie, her younger daughter, and loved her unconditionally. She was a waitress who couldn’t go to school, but her daughter had a master's degree, she was the writer of her own life, but her daughter became the author of her whole life.
This was a truly inspiring, touching, and compelling personal memoir, and I highly recommend it to anyone seeking insight into Chinese-American women, whose histories and lives interweave as they navigate life. An amazing generation exploring their own relationship with culture, heritage, identity, and love.
Portrait of the author | Photo courtesy of Karin K. Jensen